Obama riding a tiger

I overheard some sort of TV news pundit (I think it was David Gregory) using the expression “Obama is riding a tiger,” meaning he’s in a precarious or risky situation. I’m not sure what the situation was that is so dangerous, but I’ll assume it has something to do with Iran. Regardless, I thought that was a hilarious image, so I made it. This is for you, dear readers!

obama on a tiger

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Finally, a decent Obama anthem!

I was beginning to get annoyed about the fact that there was no good Obama song emerging from the citizens of this country, famous or not. I was worried that the best we had to offer as a nation was Obama Girl and that crappy will.i.am song.

I mean, Trey Parker and Matt Stone managed to pull a whole episode out of their ass the day after Obama won the election–and how many goddamn musicians do we have in this crazy country? Nobody could get it together and write a song about something everyone cared about?

Well, nobody in our country could, but that doesn’t mean other countries aren’t having a go. And that’s why I’m pleased to announce that the contest is over, and a winner has been chosen. The official song of the Obama presidency has been written, and like every other hard job in this country, it took a Mexican to do it right. A group of Mexicans, in fact. I present to you, my loyal readers…

Viva Obama, by Mariachi Aguilas de Mexico

Que bueno!

Dick Cheney vs. Mr. Potter (the saga continues)

Potter_and_Trustees with text

So it’s no secret that now-Former Vice President Dick Cheney made quite the entrance at last week’s inauguration, riding in on a sinister wheelchair quite unexpectedly. And if you recall, in late 2007 I pointed out some of the stunning similarities between Cheney and one Mr. Potter from the much-beloved Christmas classic “It’s a Wonderful Life.”

Just look at these two videos. It’s like Cheney’s trying to look like Potter!

WheelCheney

Mr. Potter gives George Bailey what for

I would also like to take the opportunity to point out that I’m not the only one who noticed the stunning resemblance between these two gentlemen. In fact, I received an usually high (more than two) number of hits on the original Cheney-Potter article immediately following the election, and after some expert-level sleuthing on ye olde Analytics, it became clear that the search term “Cheney Mr. Potter” was responsible for this burst. Check it out, I’m #4 for that shit on Google! And then it got stranger. While checking out this Google situation, I stumbled upon this U.S. News & World Report article from the day after the election. Here’s the relevant quote:

“And then at a Brookings Institution event this morning, former Bush (43) speechwriter Michael Gerson, trying to warm his audience, said he was surprised how much Cheney now looks like Mr. Potter, the villain from It’s a Wonderful Life.”

Why oh why didn’t they link to my article instead of that goofy picture? Anyway, I reckon some intern whose job it is to comb the internet for Bush administration references stumbled across my site, thought it was the best thing he’d ever seen, and spread the word around the White House. Shut up, that’s the way it goes in my head.

Medals are for grown ups, tricks are for kids (and China)

I know I should be boycotting these dumb Olympics, but I’m a sucker for stuff like gymnastics since I used to do it (not well, but I did it). I also did synchronized swimming, with even less stellar results. But that’s beside the point. I think it’s a terrible injustice that these obviously underaged Chinese bitches got gold medals for flagrantly violating the rules. It’s bad enough the judges were awarding them suspiciously high scores, but everyone knows younger girls have a HUGE advantage when it comes to things like tumbling. It just ain’t right.

I say strip them of their medals immediately! It’s the only way to preserve the integrity of the games and previous records.

Obama wins — Kucinich for VP!

Now that Barack Obama has all but secured the nomination blah blah blah, the only question that remains is, will he man up and pick someone who’s actually cool for his running mate?  I say Dennis Kucinich would be the perfect choice (except that it would make Obama a potential laughingstock).  Otherwise I don’t know…Al Gore?  Ugh, whatever.  I’m just glad it’s over.

And to all those Hillary supporters who now want to vote for McCain out of spite — for shame!  Don’t come whining to the rest of us when you have to get a back alley abortion.