Well, I never! General Hospital ripped off our very lives.

I have a shocking announcement. It has come to my attention that a certain daytime drama known as General Hospital has recently (well, if you consider last year recently) featured two characters, who apparently are some manner of rivals, named Liz and Laura! I assume Laura is the same Laura who went out with Luke. I noticed this peculiar Liz and Laura coincidence because I was searching for us on Google to see how popular we are. Turns out: very popular.

So now I’m reading all these episode descriptions written by fans with way too much free time, and they’re hilarious, because it sounds like they’re talking about me and Liz. For instance, “Later, Liz visited Laura, who advised her to have an open mind toward Lucky because some loves can overcome near-impossible odds – like hers and Lucky’s,” and “Lucky arrived for pies and filled in Liz about Laura’s condition, then noticed blood on her dress. Ric overheard the exchange. Liz lied and said it was a wine stain.” (Yahoo! TV) And here’s a tongue twister for you, “Liz tells Laura that Lucky didn’t want her or Luke to know he was there, and also tells her that Lucky has seen LuLu.”(About.com) Yeesh, couldn’t they have thrown a Eunice in there?

So anyway, I would probably start watching General Hospital just to laugh about this, but I’m a Passions woman, and nothing can change that, not even the fact that the show moved to a channel I don’t have and can’t afford. When General Hospital gets a monkey and some zombies, let me know.

I think I’m starting to like “Just Shoot Me”

I never thought I’d be saying this, but Just Shoot Me isn’t that bad a show.  I’ve been watching it on reruns now that I’m unemployed, and it’s a lot like News Radio, in a way.  It’s actually got pretty sharp writing, much of the humor is character-driven, and darn it, I like David Spade.  I’m not ashamed to say it.

But there’s more.   As it turns out, the show has interesting plotlines (for a sitcom), it features excellent character actors like Brian Posehn (and awesome guest stars like Amy Sedaris), and of course there’s that irresistible Wendie Malick, playing the standard Karen Walker role.  Anytime there’s a character who’s that Ab Fab, I’m happy.

So does this mean I’m getting old?

Tegan and Sara

Oh Webster Hall, why do I keep coming back to you when I know you’re bad for me? This question and others plagued me as I attended the Tegan and Sara show there last night. Another was “Why don’t I have earplugs?” I almost purchased some from the kindly bathroom attendant, embarrassingly neon orange though they were, but then I was informed that they were $2. I’d rather go deaf than be robbed blind. Anyway, openers Northern State delivered an energetic set full of sassy rhymes and mad beats. Currently promoting their new album Can I Keep This Pen? these bouncy ladies could in some ways be described as the female Beastie Boys, an appropriate comparison since Adrock himself produced one of their singles. They’ve also had them a few tunes on that one TV show Grey’s Anatomy, a fact they were sure to mention several times. The group also relayed the tale of how they came to be touring partners with T&S, a coveted spot indeed given the twin’s recent success through their latest album The Con and their string of MTV commercials and appearances. Turns out they all met one fateful evening at the very venue we were standing in, forming a friendship and mutual respect for each other’s artistic endeavors. Although the audience may not have been entirely awake for their set, Northern State certainly proved their talent through a display of rampant enthusiasm for their rhymes and the messages behind them. Messages political, messages social, and messages declaring “We kick ass!”

Later when the petite Canadian sisters emerged onto the stage they certainly looked cheery and adorable, a statement to which the overwhelmingly female crowd would agree. Now, while I’m aware of both Tegan and Sara’s sexual orientations, I still thought it odd that one gender would dominate the crowd of any musical performance in such a strikingly prevalent fashion. But ‘twas no matter. They both sounded fabulous vocally — furthermore to the obvious being on key, there was passion and personality behind the works being sung, making me glad to be in attendance and accentuating the very reason we attend live rock concerts. That said, I was a bit displeased that the vocals were turned up so awfully loud. While the blaring words were lovely to hear, they dominated everything else almost to the point of head explosion, so that I left half in a state of aural joy, half cursing those elitist earplugs I couldn’t afford.

Songwise, Tegan and Sara played mostly numbers off The Con with its many excellent pop gems, and a few favorites off 2004’s So Jealous. Proving the level of fan dedication these ladies have earned during their career, the crowd bounced around enthusiastically to not only more recent hits (though many had already memorized all The Con’s lyrics), but also to the few older tunes played. Apparently this energy was contagious, because both Tegan and Sara were in high spirits and proved so by showering the audience with anecdotes aplenty. They recounted tales of an awkward landlord, an hilarious ex-tour manager, apartment hunting in Montreal, and being recognized in the street due to their MTV gig. As they rambled on in their adorable way, it felt almost as if rather than standing squished in a musty ‘ol concert hall we were sitting around a bar table sharing pitchers. Their mention of various Canadian stereotypes was the icing on the cake. Later, as the evening wore on and the encore was in full swing, the audience was privy to one last surprise, a cover of the recent Rihanna hit “Umbrella,” which was pretty hilarious. Also, Tegan and Sara have funny haircuts.

Set List

Dark Come Soon
Like O, Like H
Floorplan
Nineteen
Hop A Plane
Speak Slow
So Jealous
Monday Monday Monday
Where Does The Good Go
Soil, Soil
I’ve Got You
Relief Next To Me
Are You Te Years Ago
Back In Your Head
The Con
Call It Off

You Wouldn’t Like Me
Take Me Anywhere
Umbrella
Walking With A Ghost
Living Room

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The First Weedsgiving Revisited

First Weedsgiving, Smaller

It was about this time last year we unveiled to you, our fortunate fans, the secrets of the long-forgotten holiday, Weedsgiving. In “The First Weedsgiving,” we delighted readers young and old with a timeless tale of peoples coming together to share a very special harvest. Here is the sacred scroll which tells the tale of this much-beloved holiday.

The First Weedsgiving Story, Smaller

Now I bring to you a brand-new tale that occurred exactly one year after the events described in the scroll. You see, the American Indians, being wise and at one with the earth, knew they should plant the marijuana seeds and thus prepare for seasons to come. The white people, however, smoked up all their crop like fools and had nothing left but spoiled beer when the next winter rolled around. So of course, they came a’knockin’ at the Indians’ door, and in the spirit of giving that they were known to embody, the Indians were nice enough to pass the dutchie. This artist’s rendition portrays the moment when the kindly Indians brought the colonists a bounty of the plant known officially as “the sticky-icky.”

Indian Drawing, First Weedsgiving SMALLER

I hope we’ve all learned something today, something about sharing, something about not bogarting your stash. Happy Weedsgiving to all, and to all a good night!

Just a thought

You hear a lot about the First World and the Third World, but you never hear about the Second World.  What’s going on with them?  Are they Europe, and we’re just afraid to call them that?

Notice that people aren’t talking about that Armenian genocide thing much anymore?

I’ve noticed that other political news has flooded in, erasing all traces of the conflict that, mere weeks ago, was captivating our collective attention.  I am referring, of course, to the Armenian “mass killings” or whatever Bush is calling it, which some people would like to dub a genocide.  Bush doesn’t want this, supposedly because Turkey is such an important ally right now, but I say there’s another reason for his apprehension.

If we go ahead and name that mass killing what it was, sooner or later people are gonna start getting a lot more interested in other mass killings we haven’t yet given the “G” label.  Like, maybe, that one right here in America, the one that killed, oh I don’t know, 15 million indigenous citizens.  Bush wouldn’t like it if people looked into that little genocide, now would he?  (Note: Some would argue the proper word would be “democide,” due to the lack of evidence that it was intentional.  I’m still on the fence on that one.)

Only time will tell if the American Indian tribes will ever have justice, but knowing our country, I’d say they’ve got a little more waiting to do.